I'm scared my boyfriend will leave me because I don't want to have sex with him

DEAR DEIDRE: I HAVE a wonderful boyfriend – attractive, kind and intelligent. I am a 29-year-old gay guy and he is 31.

We have been together for six months and everything is perfect apart from one thing.


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He keeps asking me to let him have intercourse with me, but I don’t like it. I prefer other ways to be intimate that don’t involve this.

We love one another. He has met a lot of my friends and now I want him to meet my parents, but I am scared he will leave me over this.

How can I explain to him without it ruining our relationship?

DEIDRE SAYS: It’s a preference, which you are perfectly entitled to have.

The idea that all gay men enjoy intercourse is a myth.

It is important never to allow yourself to be pressured into anything sexually you don’t enjoy.

Tell your boyfriend how you feel.

If he doesn’t respect your feelings, he’s not right for you.

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